Resume Hell!

A few days ago I told you that Daddy von Klapp had insisted upon me finding a job. While Linus, my agent, is out scouting around something for me, Daddy sent one of his office assistants over to help me make a resume. Here is the problem: I've never had a job before, so I have nothing to put on my resume other than "looks great in most colors" and "pouts well." After an hour of trying to make some kind of resume that I can send out to potential employers, Daddy's assistant threw her hands in the air and gave up. I asked her how was I going to make a resume that will make someone want to hire me.

Her suggestion: "Lie!"